I’ve come to realize that healing from trauma isn’t just a mental or emotional process; it’s deeply rooted in understanding how our bodies respond to and store traumatic experiences. It’s about dissecting the “mechanics” of trauma and learning to reconnect with ourselves.

When I look back, I notice a theme of feeling bad about needing anything, as if I’m not supposed to have any needs. This feeling, this guilt and shame, became my default mode.

I’ve learned that understanding the mechanics of trauma is about seeing how these experiences become stored in the body and affect the nervous system.

Trauma and the Nervous System

Humans are unique in that, as babies, we need co-regulation with a caregiver to develop our nervous systems. Unlike other mammals that can instinctively shake off traumatic events, babies rely on their parents to help them regulate their emotions. When a baby cries, signaling distress, a healthy parental response involves meeting the baby where they are, mirroring their emotions, and then guiding them back to a calm state. This co-regulation teaches the baby to self-regulate over time.

But what happens when this co-regulation is absent or inconsistent? What happens when a parent is unable to be present and meet the baby’s needs? The baby may internalize the message that their needs are a burden and begin to hide or abandon them. This can lead to a lifelong pattern of ignoring one’s own needs and living in a state of dysregulation. Addiction, for example, can stem from not being equipped to self-regulate the nervous system, leading individuals to seek external coping mechanisms.

Body Memory and the Physical Impact of Trauma

Over time, this lack of self-regulation and the adoption of unhealthy coping mechanisms can lead to physical changes in the body. Trauma isn’t just stored in our minds; it becomes ingrained in our bodies as muscle memory and neurological patterns. This means that even when we’re not consciously thinking about the traumatic event, our bodies may still be reacting to it.

This is why, for me, something as simple as skipping lunch became a sign of a deeper issue. It wasn’t just about being caught up in my work; it was about a lifelong pattern of neglecting my needs.

Practical Tools for Reconnecting with Your Body and Promoting Healing

Fortunately, there are practical tools that can help us reconnect with our bodies and promote healing from trauma. These tools aren’t about quick fixes; they’re about building resilience in our nervous systems and developing a healthier relationship with our bodies.

• Breathing Exercises: Breathing exercises can be a powerful way to regulate the nervous system and promote a state of calm. By consciously controlling our breath, we can tap into the body’s natural relaxation response and counteract the effects of trauma.
• Physical Activity: Exercise, even something as simple as walking, can help us reconnect with our bodies and release stored tension. Physical activity also increases blood flow to the brain, improving cognitive function and emotional regulation.
• Grounding Techniques: Grounding techniques involve bringing our awareness to the present moment and our physical sensations. This can be especially helpful when feeling dissociated or overwhelmed by traumatic memories. Examples of grounding techniques include focusing on the sensation of your feet on the ground, holding a comforting object, or engaging your five senses by describing what you see, hear, smell, taste, and touch.

Integrating Faith and Healing

As a person of faith, I believe that God plays a crucial role in our healing journey. Just as a loving parent meets a baby in their distress, God meets us where we are, offering comfort, guidance, and a path towards wholeness.

For me, this means recognizing that it’s okay to cry, it’s okay to struggle, and it’s okay to need help. It also means surrendering my own agenda and trusting that God will lead me on the path of healing.

A Journey of Transformation

Healing from trauma is a journey, not a destination. There will be ups and downs, moments of clarity and moments of confusion. The key is to keep moving forward, armed with the knowledge of how trauma affects our bodies and the tools to reconnect with ourselves.

By understanding the mechanics of trauma, we can begin to break free from the patterns of the past and create a more resilient and regulated future. And as we heal, we can offer our experiences and insights to others, creating a community of support and transformation.

Healing is a continuous process, and there’s no one-size-fits-all solution. I’ve found strength in understanding how faith plays a role, as shared in my article, Broken Yet Beautiful: God’s Power in Your Weakness. For those grappling with difficult emotions, remember that you can How to Renew Your Mind & Overcome Inner Darkness. It’s equally important to seek support and connection in order to Find Your Tribe & Grow Your Faith, to help one another on this journey.

References

• Complex PTSD: From Surviving To Thriving